still can't get used to it

"I still miss studs..."

It's been 18 days now...


And I still can't get used to it.
Every time I come home, no one's there to welcome me by the gate.
No one's trying to come inside the house,
No one's there to smell me
No one's cuddling between my legs
No one's knocking on the window
Peeks at the door,
Scared of water...

I see his picture on the computer.
I see myself, scratching him, holding his big face, getting pissed at his hyper self.
I see myself looking at the dog in a chicken -like position, looking sad, sleepy...
I can't help but miss Studs.
I feel lonesome that all I have with me are memories.
Looking at his pictures brought two emotions in me:
Sad, that he's not with us anymore.
Happy, when I remember all the supid times.
It just boils to one obvious fact: I miss Studs and I can't get over him.

i hate to cry over a dog

For a shallow reason I find myself crying - over a dog. Our beloved dog.

Studs passed away last night. And I couldn't get more lonely.
It might sound stupid thinking that it was just a dog. But I loved that dog.
I'm in no mood to write because every time I try to find words, it just won't suffice the feelings I have. Well, until then.

when panic!at the disco invaded manila...and my heart

Oh! How it's been so long..


Yeah. And finally, I was able to see the man I would love to welcome me down the aisle.

HAHAHAHA

Oh laugh!

But I'm serious. Panic at the disco set foot in my heart and never left. *bow

I can feel it coming

I should be making up for my obviously-failed exam in history...

It's our preliminary exams this week and here I am surfing through the cyberspace.

It didn't really occur to me that Thursday will be an uber hagard/happy, happy day until I really felt something coming.

Tomorrow, after exams, I'm off to Ateneo to pass my sister's application form.
Tomorrow, my heart will be crushed as two teams, UST and Ateneo, will compete for another game.
Tomorrow, I'm off to watch something I've been wishing for long and waiting for since summer.

It's true that you won't feel something till its really there. And fuck because its really there. I'm close to being hysterical and on the verge of slacking again. Haha.

Well, the thing is, Panic at the Disco is coming to Manila. Yes, it's true! And tomorrow's the concert at the Big Dome.

And I can't wait enough. Can't get enough.


I'll be counting on the hours left, waiting for Panic...

***

Haha! Nagpapaka-OA lang! Etchos. =P

deck the pills

need...some...sleep...

badly.
I swear, I've traded every work loaded on me back in highschool, in exchange for my pillow.
But.
Not for this week. Not for this period.
I want to experience normal classroom set-up again, not getting the feeling of dozing off, or not looking and feeling exhausted again.
badly.badly.badly.

Grr.

I'm a divaaaaa!

"Please, leave all overcoats, canes and top hats with the doorman. And from that moment, you'll be out of place and underdressed. I'm wrecking this evening already and loving every minute of it. Ruining this banquet for the mildly inspiring and choreographed. Because. When you're in black slacks with accentuating, off-white, pinstripes...
Everything goes according to plan.
...
'I'm a diva!' "
- There's a good reason these tables are numbered honey, you just haven't thought of it yet, Panic! at the disco

I'm 18! Officially.

Million thanks to those who made my night special.

define! define! define!

define: HOT

define: addiction

define: giving up


failed again so just leave me alone, define! define! define!